A Bolline memory

August 13, 2007
8:27 PM

Here is a memory from Kenny and Lindsey Bolline.

Unfortunately I didn’t get the opportunity to know Knox except from afar so to speak. But one Sunday when he was just a little guy we randomly ended up behind you guys at church. This was back when we were hoping to start our own family. Well Knox was looking over your shoulder and being very adorable and I noticed Kenny smiling at him real big. Kenny doesn’t normally pay any attention to babies. He’s quite oblivious actually in that regard but he was really taken with Knox and he commented that he was “one cool baby”. I’m not exactly sure what makes a baby “cool” ;) but apparently Knox had it. Anyway Kenny also said that he too wanted a son very much and hoped his son would also be “cool”. It wasn’t too long after that when we found out that we were expecting. I’m not sure yet if our sons are “cool” but I think Kenny is quite pleased with them either way =-).

Thanks for sharing the fun memory!

Jack and Knox

August 12, 2007
6:18 PM

Hanging out on the couch together

Reflections

August 11, 2007
9:44 AM

Knox made all our lives better, happier, more joyful. He really did. No one could be sad or upset for long with Knox around. He was quick to bring a laugh or give a hug. The kids all loved having him around and loved helping with him. Sometime they helped too much like dumping half a box of cheerios on his tray, but that is another post. I can't tell you how many times I hugged him and told him how glad we were God gave him to us, that he was so loved by us, and even that he made our life better. I thanked God repeatedly for giving him to us and for knowing that we NEEDED him. That is how I felt that God knew we needed him and gave him to us. He will always be missed.

From Kierstyn K.

August 8, 2007
11:33 PM

Not only did she send me a memory or two but pictures as well. Not only did she send me pictures but I actually managed to save them and upload them into my xanga to share!!

The memory:

One Sunday, while we were hosting college lunches, you and I were fixing the kids lunches. The menu for this particular Sunday was hot dogs and hamburgers. I fixed Micah and Knox's plate, while you took care of the older kiddos. Before I could blink, Knox had finished his hot dog, as had Micah, and they were both ready for another. Micah likes hot dogs, but not as much as Knox did! I thought of Knox this past Saturday when we had hotdogs. Micah had three. I can only imagine how many Knox would have had! The first picture is a great illustration of Knox's love for the hot dog!

The second is how I remember Knox, in your arms.

Hiking with PopPop

August 7, 2007
11:33 PM

My parents came to visit in March and one of the things we did was to go hiking at Lake Somerville. I think it was really supposed to be a short hike, but my dad isn't really one to always find out directions and such but would rather just explore so what might have been a short hike turned out to be a 3 hour hike. Dad and I took turns carrying Knox on our backs in the carrier. He really wasn't that hip on it but was a very good sport about it. You can kind of tell in the picture that he was trying to climb out. He did a lot of trying to climb up our backs. He was pretty happy when he could get down and run around!

3-dimensional

August 6, 2007
11:56 PM

That is how so many of Knox's pictures look to me. Like I could reach out and give him a squeeze, brush back his hair, tickle him...

Memories

August 6, 2007
11:12 PM

If you have a memory of Knox that you would like to share on my blog, email it to me and I'll post it. If I get several at once, I'll space them out or post them as they coincide with that time....

How long wilt thou forget me

August 5, 2007
9:44 PM

Original Trinity Hymnal, #541
From Psalm 13

How long wilt thou forget me,
O Lord, thou God of grace?
How long shall fears beset me,
While darkness hides thy face?
How long shall griefs distress me
And turn my day to night?
How long shall foes oppress me
And triumph in their might?

O Lord my God, behold me,
And hear my earnest cries;
Lest sleep of death enfold me,
Enlighten thou mine eyes;
Lest now my foe insulting
Should boast of his success,
And enemies exulting
Rejoice in my distress.

But I with expectation
Have on thy grace relied;
My heart in thy salvation
Shall still with joy confide;
And I with voice of singing
Will praise the Lord above,
Who, richest bounties bringing,
Hast dealt with me in love.

Psalm 13

For the director of music. A psalm of David.

1 How long, O LORD ? Will you forget me forever?

How long will you hide your face from me?

2 How long must I wrestle with my thoughts

and every day have sorrow in my heart?

How long will my enemy triumph over me?

3 Look on me and answer, O LORD my God.

Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death;

4 my enemy will say, "I have overcome him,"

and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

5 But I trust in your unfailing love;

my heart rejoices in your salvation.

6 I will sing to the LORD,

for he has been good to me.

Things people say

August 5, 2007
1:25 AM

I was thinking about someone I knew a long time ago. She didn't want to have any children. Her reason...there was too much pain and suffering the world. She didn't want to expose them to that. She thought it was cruel to bring a child into this world. At the time, I was young and understood the sentiment and I guess I still understand where she was coming from. . But later, I came to understand that line of thinking is wrong. For one thing biblically we are commanded to have children. Second, we have hope. I think she was forgetting that. God hasn't forgotten this is a fallen world. It isn't the Garden of Eden, but we are promised a better place. I understand better than ever that we live in a fallen world; I understand better than ever what suffering really is; I understand better than ever what real pain is. However, I still don't agree with what she said. Even though many are suffering over the death of Knox, those that really knew him are better having loved and lost him than not having had him at all. I have to believe that as painful as this is for his brother and sisters, that they are better off having had him for a brother and that going through this difficult time is going to strengthen them. And guess what...Knox isn't going to know any more suffering, but if we hadn't ever been blessed with him in the first place, eternity wouldn't exist for him!

A Matt Memory

August 5, 2007
1:12 AM

I lifted this off the comments of Hannah's blog, because it made me smile so I thought it might make others smile too.

The crocbow reminds me of my favourite K-nox (I liked to pronounce a hard 'K' in his name) story--which happened to occur the last time I ever saw him on Easter Sunday.

While we were at the Dunlap's ranch, just after the egg hunt, I was making my way back up the front steps when...BAM! I didn't see the little bugger and knocked him down the steps!

It didn't hurt him--but it sure was funny watching him 'do the windmill' down the steps which sent his tiny blue crocs sailing in different directions.

As I recall, he didn't even cry; I'm pretty sure of that because, if he had, I think the Hammer of Rachel would have been forthcoming on my noggin.

Here is one of many pictures I have of him that day.

Buddies

August 5, 2007
1:01 AM

Jack and Knox. Brothers. They were getting to be such buddies. We(the girls, Jon and I) often would call both Jack and Knox, Buddy as a nickname. Jack had taken to calling Knox that some. "Hey Buddy!", he would say. They played together. They fussed some, but they had such fun together. Jack was a good big brother. He knew to share with Knox and to let him do things his way at least part of the time. In the picture above, he was chasing Knox and you can tell that he was letting Knox stay just ahead of him...letting him "win." I can just hear him telling Knox, "I am going to get you, Buddy." My heart aches that Jack doesn't get to grow up with his "buddy." I pray that he really and truly remembers the fun they had together!

Just Because

August 2, 2007
10:22 PM

Currently Reading
At the Back of the North Wind
By George MacDonald

Hot chocolate

August 2, 2007
12:33 AM

Here is a picture of my favortie mug given to me by a member of our church and part of a basket of goodies some "growing-up" friends sent me. The friends that sent me the Hot chocolate said to crank up the AC and prentend it was cold and enjoy it. What they don't know is I am a hot chocolate addict and drink it regularly regardless of temperature!!! Thanks y'all!

C.S. Lewis

July 31, 2007
10:14 PM

" I think I am beginning to understand why grief feels like suspense. It comes from the frustration of so many impulses that had become habitual. Thought after thought, feeling after feeling, action after action, had [Knox] for their object. Now their target is gone. I keep on through the habit fitting an aroow to the srting, then I remember and have to lay the bow down. So many roads lead thought to [Knox]. I set out on one of them. But now there's an impassable frontierpost across it. So many roads once; now so many cul-de-sacs. "

Playing in the window

July 30, 2007
10:43 AM

One of Knox's favorite things to do was to play trains in the windowsill of the breakfast room or cars on the windowsill in the den. The breakfast room had really become more of the train room and Jack and Knox would set up the tracks on the windowsill and drive and drive and drive. Someone gave us a traintable that we put in there but Knox still preferred the window. When he wasn't playing trains in the breakfast room he was in the den driving one of their 50 million cars up and down the window sill in the den. Here are some pictures courtesy his Aunt Shannon.

(ignore the dirty window...obviously a bird had been watching him!)

Sundays

July 29, 2007
11:34 AM

On Sundays I always had some extra time with Knox. During the school year Jon goes to church around 7AM to get ready for the 8AM service, so I would get everyone up and ready for church. Then I would take the 4 older kids to Sunday School and bring Knox back home for a short nap before church. He didn't nap well at church so he would be really cranky by the time church was over if he didnt' nap first; I liked having him with me anyway. Then we would drive to church and I would talk to him and play with his feet on the way there. After church the kids would play outside in the courtyard for a while before going home. Everyone naps on Sunday afternoons or at least has some quiet time. Jon usually has meeting later in the afternoon and then led Sr high youth on Sunday night. THe big kids all had Covenant kids and Knox and I hung out together. Sometimes we stayed at church visiting and then playing with the other kids afterwards and sometimes we hung out together at home. I always enjoyed spending that extra time with him. He always made me smile!

Here is a Sunday picture.

Just Because

July 26, 2007
11:41 PM

An Elizabeth memory

July 25, 2007
9:01 PM

Elizabeth, Emma, and I went to Joann's today and then we were going to go to HEB(a grocery store for you nontexans). SHe says...remember that time we walked from Joann's to HEB and Knox kept trying to get off the sidewalk and you carried him, but he kept wanting you to put him down so he could walk and so you put him up on your shoulders and carried him like that. When you were carrying him he kept wanting down but on your shoulders way up high he was happy.

Yes that is how she told it...in one breath I think. I do vaguely remember that trip. I remember thinking that it was going to take 3 times as long to walk down there and back but having one of those stop and smell the roses and take things the slow way for a change moments. Then having to walk back to Joanns and the van with groceries and all the kids and thinking that it wasn't one of the smartest things I have ever done!!

teeth grinding

July 23, 2007
11:26 PM

Looking at that top picture of Knox learning to crawl reminded me how he was sooooo bad about grinding his teeth when he was teething.

Just Because

July 23, 2007
1:32 PM